It's funny how having children can change your prospective so much and how what you once thought was most important, isn't quite a priority anymore. Having children makes you stop, take a breath and think about the things that you do.
Many who know me that my marriage surly has its up and downs. Now,normally I don't go discussing those things that are considered personal to friends and family, so shhhh! Let's keep this among us, okay? Don't tell anybody. LOL. But,I've come to realize that the honest to goodness reason my marriage has lasted as long as it has is because of the love that I have. Not the love for my husband. Not even the love for myself (Lord knows there's a lot of that to go around), but the love that I have for those 3 little people in my life. For me, even when I think that the world around me is crumbling and I can't take one more day of marriage, I can't help but stop to think of them and the things that they deserve in life. They deserve to have a childhood as harmonious and fullfilling as their father and I can provide. Sometimes that means doing things we would not necessarily do or taking things we wouldn't necessarily take from marriage without children.
Children cause you to become less selfish and make you stop and think when those points of anger are so high that you just want to walk away. They say that 50% of all marriages end in divorce, but the statistics I worry most about is that nearly 60% of black children grow up without a father in their home. Now, I'm no pschiatrist, but I do know that many problems can stem from divorce or just not having 2 loving parents in your home. And after watching Black in America on CNN for the last 2 nights, I am convinced that if there is anything worth fighting for, it's my children, and in turn, that means that I have to fight to make my marriage work by all means. Their futures are of the utmost importance to me. And there is no problem so great between their father and I that I can't work my butt off to change to ensure a fighting chance at a good life for them.
It's funny how kids can change your prospective on your life, huh?
1 comment:
You write very well.
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