Sunday, May 2, 2010

Friends Schmiends!

Okay, so today was also a weird day as I ran into a blast from the past.

It's a long story, but I'mma try to get it all out before I have to be off to a dreaded Chuck E. Cheese .

Fred was my best friend in high school for years until he and his family moved away.  And we were just that.  Friends.  We would spend hours joking and playing on the phone, and even when I was on a punishment, he was the only person that my mom would let me talk to or would let visit.  He knew everything about me and I knew everything about him.  When he left I was hurt.  I even concocted an imaginary friend name Fred as his replacement who I kept all through 12th grade.  LOL!  Crazy I know, but I was a clown and my friends got a kick out of "Fred".  LOL!

The real Fred and I lost contact and life moved on.  I always referred to him as one of my best friends.  

ON THE OTHER HAND, I always said that MEN AND WOMEN CAN'T BE FRIENDS.  This is a statement I made all the time. A statement I lived by. I have always believed that if a man and a woman are friends, SOMEBODY will eventually start catching feeling.  Except with me and Fred, I always said.  He was a true friend to me.

So, a few years after I moved here from Germany, I was in Kmart and Olan Mills Photography was set up at the front of the store trying to get people signed up to take pictures.  I stopped to have a look and I see a picture of Fred and a woman that I assumed was his wife.

WOW!  I was SHOCKED!  I mean, I had no idea he was in the same place as me and I was so excited!  I went home and searched the phone book and found a few Fred K's.  So I called them, ALL OF THEM, and when I got to the entry that said Fred and Keisha K. I called, asked for Keisha, stated my case and who I was looking for, middle name and all and Low and Behold.... it was him!

Wow! I talked to his wife and asked her if it was okay with her if he called and she was so cool and had already heard about me and knew that he and I went to school together.  She even knew how Fred has stopped talking to me back in the days because his girlfriend told him she didn't want us to be friends anymore.  She and I became pretty cool. I talked to her often, went to visit, met their kids.  It was so good to have my old friend back in my life.  While Hubs was in Korea last time, Fred's younger brother and sister were killed in a fatal car crash.  Of course, I was there for him, for his mom, and for his family.  Fred would call me there after about how sad he was. He stopped by one day because he worked close by.  As we sat and talked the conversation changed and things got a little uncomfortable as he told me that he had always had a crush on me.  I sat there with my mouth open as my best friend slipped away from me.  For me, that was the end of that.  I was so disappointed that I couldn't allow myself to see him anymore and I pretty much just dropped him from my life.  Didn't answer phone calls from him or his wife anymore and eventually I changed my number (for other reasons) and never put his number in my new phone.

So today, I get to Kennedy's game and i see the team from the Y that we were playing was on the field.  Who do I see?  Fred!  I was so thrilled to have my Hater Blockers (dark sunglasses) because with my face covered I was hiding.  Well the game went on and he didn't see me. I noticed that Keisha was sitting on the other bleachers, out of eyesight, didn't see me at all.

The game ended and I took a mad dash to field 2 where Cam's team would be playing. I knew that I would have to face the situation soon, but today I was not ready to.

I get to the other field, still wearing my hater blockers and I breathed a sigh of relief.  I was on the phone with my BFF and telling her about our old friend and how I didn't want to be seen.  I look up only to see Fred and his HUGE crew crossing the field to the same side.  DANG!  How many kids he GOT???  He was coaching the team playing Cam as well!  

Keisha went and sat on the bleachers so I stayed on the side where the players were sitting and took pictures.  i noticed him looking at me from the field like he was trying to figure out if it was me or not, but I hid behind my camera and Hater Blockers.  I also noticed that Keisha kept looking in my direction.  I was actually the only one in that space she could have been looking at because I was the only one on that side in that corner of the field.  After the game, she walked by like she didn't see me.  

I knew Fred saw me, but after the game was over, he walked almost right in between the coach and me and acted as if he didn't notice me at first, took a step back and gave me that, "Is that YOU?" look.  He said smiled said hello, then spoke to the man that was standing next to me, shook his hand and said, "Fred."  He thought it was Hubs!  LOL!  He kept it moving, probably for lack of knowing what to say or what I had told my husband about him.

So, I know I have to face this with Keisha, and I wonder what he has told her about why I disappeared the way that I had.  I'm sure she's pissed with me for disappearing without an explanation and probably a bit suspicious.  Next game, I'm sure they will be out there somewhere.  I'm not sure how to approach it.  How to answer the questions. I'm still pissed at Fred for crossing that line and destroying my trust in us as friends.  Maybe I'm over reacting.  He was just being honest, while I was being delusional and not going by my own words.  



Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

It really does depend on whether Fred was confessing that he "used" to have a crush on your or still has one.

If he's still with Keisha after all this time, then, you can assume that he's happily married to her. You sorta do need to clear the air if Keisha asks why you stopped keeping in touch. It may be that Fred was feeling a little remorseful of what he had and then lost.

The friendship, if it is to be, will now include not only you and Fred but Keisha and your hubs too. If you're willing to forge a couple type friendship, then go for it and just make sure Fred knows that there will be no overstepping boundaries.

Kristin said...

Wow! What a crazy story....I think I have to agree with you on the men and women not being friends thing. Now couples being friends and getting together is one thing, but just one man and one woman together....I agree with you on that sometimes leading to a bad thing. I hope it all works out for you!!