Friday, September 18, 2009

Is this why PTOs have a bad name?

You know, I really had to step back and take a breather today after getting an email from a fellow PTO member, The Prez.

Now, I had to take a step back and breathe because honestly, I have to make sure that I was careful with how I approached this situation. I'm still not sure how to handle it and I'm not sure I can talk about it here without saying my REAL feelings, but I will say this. I now see why PTO/PTA's have a rep all over the US. I see why when people hear JOIN PTO they run in the other direction. I understand now why PTO's/PTA's are often considered cliquish and many parents don't want to get involved.

There has to be a balance of control and many times among women, that's a hard task.

Last year, being a part of PTO was fun. This year not so much.

Last year, I was quiet about a lot, agreed with a lot. I was a worker bee and I pretty much did what I was asked.

This year, I have opinions and ideas that I want to share, changes I'd love to see happen. This year I want to get more people involved, have more people taking charge of events. Give people the opportunity to fully be a part of PTO. I feel like if you put the opportunities out there for people to get involved and let them put together their groups and plans then you get more involvement than just that of the board members and the people they beg to help.

When you have a president who wants to be in control of it all, doesn't want to step back and give others a chance to shine, my ideas for a better PTO go right out of the window. When you're dealing with a control-freak-micro-manager who feels that she should be the chairperson for every event or at least someone "she knows" should chair, PTO will never work the way that it was truly intended.

Oops, I guess I said more than I wanted to say. Hope I haven't hurt any one's feelings here.

My Blog.

Deal with it!


T.Allen-Mercado said...

Way back before I started homeschooling, I tried the ended in me lunging across this woman's (the president's) diningroom table and calling her (in my outdoor, sporting event voice) "a passive-aggressive control freak". The expression on her and the other mothers' (clique member's) faces was priceless...That was the end of it for me. I'm way done equating my self-worth with titles and trifle matters, I'm above needing to exhalt myself over others. I joined the PTO because I knew I could breathe new life into the stale suburban clique-but come to find out stale is the way they liked it!

Cut your losses, you can invest in your children's academic lives better (and sans school kid-like clliques) as an individual contributor.

Stephanie said...

People are so resistant to change. Especially people "in charge" on boards like this one. I agree with T. Allen; it might be time to cut your losses to save your sanity! ;)

Diva Ma @ Mommy Fabulous said...

My Husband reminds me that he told me so all the time. I can see this ending badly as I play all of the possible scenerios over in my head. I see myself saying the exact words that T. Allen said to her PTO Prez, but I know my self. It will be a whole lot worse! I'm a sweet person and I spent all of last year being the "yes Girl" VP. I see room for improvement, but the one in charge obviously feel as if I'm stepping on her toes with my ideas. I may have to take you guys' advice! But not just yet!